_¸,.-=°²[ケイトリン]²º°=-.,¸_ (caitaro) wrote in asexuals,
_¸,.-=°²[ケイトリン]²º°=-.,¸_
caitaro
asexuals

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hiz!~

Hi everyone.
I had a dream last night... and so i posted it in my journal... which somehow eventually ended up being a ranty post about my anti-sex feelings... and how love != sex..( but most people think of it that way...)

when it hit me. I didnt belong to any LJ Asexual communities!! So i joined a couple.. And i'll prolly post this same message on the other one so apologies for that :P but...

Ever since i was little i guess i didn't get the whole sex thing.. Um.. I mean.. i didnt even realize it EXISTED till... like i duno 7th gradeish.. Because i never got "the talk" (Still havent actually.. and im 17 now...) so when i DID hit puberty it was pretty bad x_x But anyway...

But i guess i really acknowledged it's existance when in 8th grade.. my so called friend came to school crying because she "went to a party and got raped".. Um.. so she eventually cooked up the story of BECAUSE she raped she HAS to work as a stripper at some bar.. and im unfarmiliar with where she lives.. so i had no idea what she was talking about... But so she came to school wearing a iddy bitty skirt and huge ho boots and crap.. saying she had to go to work after school.. and im like "o_O okay..." So eventually the next year she was at my house spending the night for some reason.. and i was filling out a LJ survey :P (but it was un Ujournal.. now dead..) And one of the questions was like "blah have you ever had sex" so im like *Insert rant about how can they expect me to have done that already* So was on the couch and she says "Oh i lost it to so and so..." and i was shocked. and/or. Appauled. By that statement. I dont think i could have looked at her the same way again after that... But i never really thought about ME doing it ever... So i guess eventually She stopped bein my freind so she could go be freinds with her other ho freinds. And my other freind left because.. i duno she was prolly too busy being a ho.. And sooo i got my freind for 10th grade.. Taryn.. she posts on my journal sometimes.. I dont think shes asexual.. But.. shes a virgin as far as i know.. She fantasizes about stuff and is obsessed with yaoi and whatever but i duno... Then SHE moved.. but so ever since then.. all my freinds have been.. DUN DUN DUN.. guys.. (i graduate next month..) and Neither of them have ever had girlfreinds that i know of.. and i havent really asked them.. but im ASSUMING they are both virgins.. and Actually i asked one of them out and he REJECTED me horribly X_X i duno why but *shrug* hes my best freind now...

So like last year MSN had an article talking about asexuality.. I didnt even know it existed until i read that.. But as i read it.. it's like a lightbulb went off in my head.. THIS.. is what i am.. There's nothing.. WRONG with me.. there ARE other people like me out there!!!! SO i showed my dad.. he just said "ok.. maybe" my dad is a big sex freak :\ unfortunatly..

moving along....


I have a boyfreind.. we've been together for 2 years now.. And i love him more than anything. (And thats REAL love not sexishness desires x-x) however i met him on the internet.. On BYOND actually.. But.. We've met in real life throghout the years... He was over last weekend actually with my other 2 guy freinds.. and 1 of them decided to through my underwear everywhere X_X but anyway... Our relationship is really.. REALLY.. good =3 and Even though i never really asked him about it.. I think he MAY.. be asexual.. but i dont know... I should really ask him about that >_< but.. I know i am.. I have ABSOLUTELY /NO/ desire whatsoever to have sex AT ALL... SO when he comes over we hug and stuff ^_^ and i REALLY enjoy that sort of thing.. But... You know sometimes i feel like it's not enough.. Like.. you can go further with the relationship but i'm not sure how..

So I guess my question is to you guys... is.. If you DO have a relationship... with someone.. What sort of things do you like to do.. um... i duno have fun or express your love for eachother... Even though we are both 17.. (He'll be 18 next month..) We both cant drive. Me im petrified of it... I duno why he doesnt *shrug* but.. My dad can drive us places sometimes.. but you know we cant go out driving or whatever.. Um.. and drugs and drinking are totally out of the question.. Im very anti drug anti drinking too.. Um. Also Im very anti porn.. anti.. masturbation.. anti naked too XD!!! I guess im anti a lot of things.. *shrug*



Ummm.. so i guess thanks for reading my long rambly post about nothing ^_^;;

and thanks in advance for any info and whatnot..

<3 Cait
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  • 3 comments
Don't know your area but do you have Public Transport, you could always go for rides instead of drives. .80c used to get you there and back once. What have you done in the past? Take up a new hobbie together that involves outdoors or other people even.

Oh, I am so full of advice this evening!?

Stay Happy!
You say you're anti-masturbation and anti-nakedness - by that, do you mean for your self, a personal choice or do you believe others should be too...
Hi there, I didn't say any of those things but if you've explored all those other thing's the event's I listed are also ok to do with a partner as you mentioned you didn't have a car and you were 17 and have a friendship.

But then what was I to expect from a 17 year old...live your own life, respect others.